This isn’t directly related to running, but it’s pretty close and since most of you who read this blog are female I thought I’d take a minute to talk about body image. Like every other female (and male, but I’m not one so I can’t comment directly) I definitely struggle with body image. I don’t like this, I don’t like that, this is too big, this is too small… running has been a great way to get over some of my misgivings about the way I was made but they still creep up from time to time.
This morning I was at a work event and wearing a sleeveless dress. It’s hot out and I’m pro second amendment so I busted out the guns (ok sorry, couldn’t resist). Actually, one of the things I get annoyed about is that my body is SO muscular and solid that I can look stocky even when I’m very lean. I was talking to a woman I don’t know well who has what I consider the “ideal” body type. She’s light, lean, small boned with nice small limbs. She’s blonde and sweet and petite and so so cute. She leaned over and said, “I would just kill for your figure! Your muscle is so beautiful and you’re so strong. I’m so jealous!” I was floored! Here I was, jealous of her leanness and lightness and she wanted more of my muscle! I’m not saying this to fish for compliments but it did make my day.
I, probably like a lot of you, spend a ton of time with really lean runner friends not wearing much more than shorts or tights and a tank top or tshirt. It’s easy to compare myself to them and think, “wow I’ll never be as _____ as ______” or to believe that they don’t struggle with feeling inadequate in their own skin. But I think the truth is that we all see flaws in ourselves and all have pieces internal and external that we’d like to change. But the very thing we hate could be something someone else wants. The fact is, we’re all different. And beauty is different to everyone. And we were all created with a purpose and our body is part of that. And that’s cool.
I don’t have this stuff figured out. But these thoughts were just rolling around in my head. And the fact that we can run at all is pretty amazing.
And yes, I did my 800s the other day. They weren’t the fastest I’ve ever run them and it wasn’t necessarily fun, but I did them. I think I might be on my way to wanting to get fast again. Maybe. I don’t know. We’ll see. Tempo run tomorrow will tell me. At 4:45 am… YIKES. Now I’m off to run easy without a garmin. It’ll be fun!